We have some amazing mentors in the Millionaire Money Mentors forums. Some of them are even accomplished authors!
Today we have a guest post from one of those authors, Monica Scudieri, author of Grab Your Slice of Financial Independence.
Monica has an awesome story of achieving financial independence despite some pretty tough obstacles, many of which she shares in this post.
I hope this will be an encouragement to those of you with money challenges that there is hope and with tenacity and time, many of these obstacles can be overcome.
With that said, here’s Monica…
—————-
My path to financial independence was less “graceful swan” and more “drunken flamingo”. I made so many mistakes (and some very expensive ones) that it’s hard to believe I was ever going to be able to quit my 9-to-5 and retire, but I did just that in 2022 at the ripe age of 52. What’s even more wild is I was able to turn my financial trainwreck-of-a-life around in just ten years and reach my definition of financial independence.
But telling you the ending of my FI journey is like flipping to the last chapter of a book so, let’s start at the beginning.
Starting Out
In the mid-60’s, my parents immigrated to Miami Beach, Florida from a small Italian town in the Abruzzo region. My dad got called for a tailoring job. That is how they ended up in Miami Beach. He accepted the job, asked my mom’s parents for her hand, they married and shortly after, he moved to Miami Beach. My mom followed a year later.
Growing up with immigrant parents was like living on Italian sovereign ground when I was home. My parents spoke Italian, kept Italian culture, played Italian music and generally socialized with other Italian families who also immigrated to the Miami area.
My mom did not support or understand why I would want to go to college when all I needed to learn was how to cook, clean and raise kids… and she could teach me all of that. Nonetheless, I became the first in my family to graduate college and with no debt, thanks to my dad.
Looking at things through my moms’ eyes, I can understand why she didn’t see value in my going to college. Neither of my parents finished elementary school but they were some of the smartest people I knew. They moved to a new country with no money, language, or support. Over time, they learned to speak English, built a successful tailoring business, became part of a community and raised a family with no help from either of their families. They paid for both my brother and I to go to college and paid off their home mortgage.
They were big savers and lived below their means, but investing was a different story. They invested in the stock market … but only once. The way my mom told the story, a customer came in and told them about a “great stock tip”. Said it was ripe to go up and now was the perfect time to invest. So, they took a chance and invested in this one company. The next day they checked to see what the stock was doing. My mom said, “it went so low, we no see it no more.” And that was the end of stock market investing.
Through it all, my parents did not believe in credit cards, though after they divorced (in my early 20’s), my mom opened her first credit card. Once a year she would pull it out to make one purchase, pay it off, then put it away. She liked knowing it was there, just in case.
Anyway, I graduated college, got my first corporate job and after two years I moved to California with that job. I got married, bought a house and had a couple of kids. We even adopted two cats from the SF SPCA.
The American Dream
I was living the American dream of a career, marriage, mortgage, two kids, two cats and debt. I was so busy, I didn’t have time to think about savings, investing or retirement. Retirement seemed light years away.
In our marriage, financially, we joined everything, but, we were not on the same page. He didn’t see a problem with carrying credit card debt. Worse, he would cause checks to bounce because he would withdraw cash and not tell me and even locked us out of our bank accounts… more than once. Don’t get me wrong, I spent too, but never more than we had and certainly with the intention of paying our credit cards off at the end of the month.
By 2005, we moved to North Carolina. Three years later, we separated. The kids (and cats) stayed with me.
A year after separation, I was divorced and unemployed, carrying $257,000 of debt, half of which was the mortgage. The kids were in preschool and kindergarten, and my mom lived four states away. Below is a snapshot of my net worth.
This was all during the 2008 financial crisis, a.k.a. the Great Recession. For those of you unfamiliar, the stock market dropped about 50%, the housing market crashed and there were no jobs to be found for even the most qualified people. Layoffs were happening across all industries. And unemployment hit a high of 10% by 2009.
Just like that, I lost my temp job, couldn’t afford to sell the house (or buy a smaller one) and the little cash I did have was cut in half by the divorce and the recession.
This was my starting point on the path to financial independence.
Single Parenting
Being a single parent, it was near impossible to find employment because I was limited to:
- A short commute
- Needed flexible time
- I could not cover overtime, travel or weekend work. That alone put several applicants ahead of me for the few jobs I could find.
The Outrageous Goal
Nonetheless, I dreamed big and set an outrageous goal of a $1 million net worth. I look back on that goal and realize how abstract it was. Does that million include my primary resident? What is the net worth made up of? But what I was really asking myself was, how would that $1 million net worth translate to covering monthly bills?
The truth is when I initially set that goal, I had no answers to any of those questions, nor did I even realize that some of those questions were on the table. Then again, maybe it didn’t matter. I didn’t even have a solid foundation on which to build that kind of net worth. What I knew for sure was I never wanted to be in a vulnerable position again. I did not want to be dependent on a paycheck. Bottomline, I wanted better for my kids and me.
Poor?
That first year, after the divorce, my son (then a first grader) came home and asked if we were poor. I was surprised by the question and asked why he would ask such a thing. He said that he was told we are poor.
After thinking about it, I sat him down and said, “we are not poor because we have clothes on our back, a roof over our head and food on the table, but more importantly, we have each other. So long as we have that, we can never be poor.”
I like telling that story because, what I have come to understand is “poor” is more a state of mind and less what is in your bank account. When he asked that question, I had no job, no prospects, $257,000 of debt, and very little money in the bank. But what I did have was my why, my direction, and a drive so strong it carried us through some of the most challenging and stressful times of my life.
Since that conversation, the lesson I learned is money provides security, not happiness. You could have millions to your name and be lonely. Conversely, you could have pennies to your name and be surrounded by friends and family that love and respect you.
The second lesson is that money doesn’t make all your problems go away but I do go to bed knowing that I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food on the table.
The FI Journey
The first five years of my FI journey started after my separation and subsequent divorce; I went on unemployment three times for a total of 22 months. That goal of a million-dollar net worth got a little further away in the first five years, as the unemployment months chipped away at my savings.
But in 2012, there was a small turnaround, a glimmer of hope, in the housing market. Enough of one to sell my house and downsize into a new home.
With this one move I was able to pay off the $257,000 of debt and put a 50% down payment on the new home, while still holding back enough cash to move and get the new home setup. I also opened a HELOC on the new home and used it to purchase five SFH’s over the next three years, for cash.
Purchasing Five SFH’s in Three Years
You are probably wondering; how did I go from unemployment and $257,000 of debt to purchasing five SFH’s?
In those first five years, I spent time job hunting and working contract jobs, but I also did A LOT of research. I took the time to educate myself on all things personal finance. I worked hard at building a solid foundation and learned how to track my day-to-day cashflow before I even attempted to build a budget. Towards the end of each year, I would look back on my spending and use that to create a new budget to optimize cashflow and support my lifestyle and financial goals.
I learned that budgeting was not a tool to build scarcity but to build a rich life as I wanted and needed it to be. Mid-year I would look at my spending and make any adjustments to the budget as things would unfold and new information came up. Lastly, I learned to leverage sinking funds paying myself monthly for a specific goal basically, setting cash aside for annual expenses.
During those first five years, I also got creative in finding quick cash, like selling the furniture out of my house (I was going to downsize anyway), dog sitting, and cooking for others. I read everything I could find on managing home finances from books and articles to podcasts and blogs. This led me to rental properties among other ideas to create income streams. Most of the ideas I came up with did not work out, but rental properties looked very promising. I even went so far as to look at properties to rent and what that would look like. I used the 1% rule (rent must be 1% or greater than the purchase price), to practice ruling out properties that did not fit my criteria. The more research I did on the real estate market the more I was convinced that this would be a great fit for me.
I did everything I could think of and within my control to be prepared for new opportunities. There was no point in looking back and regretting all the lost opportunities. What I know to be true is change is constant and there is always a next opportunity.
With my move behind me, a HELOC to leverage for cash purchases, I went to the bank to secure a preapproved loan. I did not want to leave anything to chance in building my real estate portfolio.
No bank would approve me for a preapproved loan to purchase rental properties. I was, after all, a single mom with a temp job (which was not considered real income in the eyes of the bank). Because of this, no one could see a path of how I would pay them back. Interestingly, child support did count as income but not enough to sway anyone to take a chance on me. That is until, I talked to the branch manager at my bank. I explained to him my plan and he also told me that the bank would not give me preapproval for the same reasons as all the other banks. BUT, he continued, he would talk to the commercial loan officer and go to bat for me. Long story short, I secured a preapproved loan for one rental property.
Once I got my preapproval letter, I registered an LLC for my real estate portfolio and began shopping for my first rental property, which I purchased in 2013 with my HELOC for cash. After the purchase I would go to the bank and use my preapproved loan to pay 80% of the purchase price back to my HELOC. The remaining 20% I would work to pay off. The next two years I repeated the process of getting a new preapproval for two rentals instead of one, purchase with HELOC, get loan for 80% of PP, pay the HELOC. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
By the time I got my fifth and ultimately last rental, I went to a different bank and secured a 15/7 term 4% fixed consolidated loan. I was able to consolidate the rental loans as well as pay off the balance on my HELOC and saved thousands of dollars in the process.
As for the job market, it took until 2014 to secure a permanent job which allowed me to max out my 401(k) and open a Roth. Eventually I opened a Health Savings Account, something I wish I had done sooner.
By 2018 my net worth had reached $1 million, and I was in complete disbelief. For the last ten years, all I could focus on was getting on stable financial ground and never be reliant on a paycheck. Here I was with a million-dollar net worth.
I took a year just to let the dust settle and take it all in. Not to mention, I was head down, laser focused on building wealth, I had no time to think about what came next. There was literally no plan for next chapter because I thought it would take longer than it did.
That year led me to a work opportunity that I took and stayed a couple more years. After a while, the work was not fulfilling, things were changing and I no longer wished to stay. But what was next I wants was not sure, until I went to my first FIRE event, FinCon2018.
I felt like a flower that had been living life partially wilted. I came alive surrounded by my people. The conversations were amazing. There were so many like-minded people concentrated in one place, it was like drinking from a firehose. Each person I met asked what I was doing there. I would tell them my story and the reply was always the same. “you should write a book!” Honestly, I thought they were saying it to be nice, but more and more the same thing was repeated, write a book.
“Who would want to hear about a single mom struggling financially?” was the question I would come back with, but the response was also the same every time… “everyone! Lots of people struggle with finances.”.
A quick Google search pointed me to statista.com showing that in 2018, there were 16+ million single moms and 3+ million single dads in the US alone. Maybe they were right. Maybe there is an audience interested in my story.
The Book
I have never written a book before nor have I ever thought I had anything interesting to say and certainly not enough to fill a book. Not to mention the number of personal finance books already published. Why add another one? How would I add value in an already crowded genre? I started writing just to see where it would take me and to my surprise, I had a lot to say.
Two hundred pages later, in September 2022, I published, Grab Your Slice of Financial Independence. It outlines my ten-year FI journey from divorce to FI, plus I group the years into phases and provide directions on how others can do the same. But what really sets my book apart is I share my net worth at the end of each year. Highlighting the fact that achieving financial independence is not something that happens instantly. This isn’t the lottery!
When people ask me why I wrote it, it really came down to this: I didn’t go through all of that for nothing. I wrote it for single parents, so they would have hope and not feel alone. I have received many thank you’s from more than just single parents. I am told my story gives hope and a different perspective on how to look at home finances. Sharing my story has changed lives. How crazy is that?!?
This snapshot of my ten-year FI journey doesn’t cover everything, but I do hope it continues to inspire others to see their finances differently, take a chance on building income streams and not dwell on opportunities missed.
It’s been six years since I reached financial independence and two years since I quit my corporate job. Today my net worth has grown to $2.3 million, and my primary home is valued at $500,000. When I look back there are many lessons I learned. How many do you relate to?
1. Know your why.
My why of not wanting to be dependent on a paycheck was crystal clear. I had it taped up where I could read it every day. Every year when I created my goals, it was with this one vision in mind.
When I had setbacks, I reminded myself of my why, learn from the situation and figured out how to move forward. Having my why kept me motivated.
2. Always re-evaluate your goals
Every year is an opportunity to learn and grow. Every year is filled with wins and losses, challenges and victories. Life progresses whether we are paying attention or not.
Your goals, while valid when you first wrote them, may need to be updated based on new information. Maybe an opportunity comes along that you did not consider a few months ago and things would need to be shuffled. Stay flexible.
3. Shame and Guilt
When it comes to financial mistakes, feelings of shame and guilt are strong. In fact, so strong it can be paralyzing, keeping us from looking at our financial situation. The anticipation can eat us alive.
It was the hardest thing to take that first step after the divorce to look at my financial situation, calculating net worth, making a list of debt.
And while it was a tough pill to swallow it was also freeing because for the first time, I had a defined starting point. I could make plans and goals. The first step is the hardest and the most critical.
4. Change is the only constant.
Knowing history provides clarity. When I look at when some of the most used retirement tools came to be, it gives greater empathy for my mom’s generation. Many of the tools we use today, she either didn’t have access to or didn’t have access until later. Where do you fall on the below timeline? Your parents? Grandparents?
- 1974: the Individual Retirement Account, IRA, was established under the Employee Retirement Income Security Act, ERISA.
- 1974: women were granted the right to open a bank account without their husband co-signing.
- 1978: the 401(k) was introduced as part of the Revenue Act but didn’t become popular until the 1980’s.
- 1988: women were legally allowed to start a business without a male relative co-signing.
As of this writing, it’s 2024. Fifty years ago, women were allowed to open their own bank account… 50 years ago. Thirty-six years ago, women were allowed to start their own business without a male relative co-signing… 36 years ago!!!
When I think about these laws and my 20’ish year-old daughter… she will never know the struggle of the women before her to fight for these and so many other basic rights.
5. Not All Friendships are Created Equal
The people who start on this journey may not be the same people at the end. Envy and jealousy are terrible things to feel towards a friend and erodes the very fabric of that friendship.
As the season of some friendships ends, it makes room for new friendships. New adventures. New chapters.
6. Do Nothing
When I reached financial independence, the best advice I got was to do nothing for at least six months. The mind and body need time to adjust from work life to financial independence life. I didn’t understand it or believe that was necessary but it was… necessary.
My last day was on a Friday. Monday morning, I went to my home office and the only thing different was one less laptop. It was a struggle to do nothing, I felt so unproductive. Once the book was out, I took some time off and did part-time nothing. Hey, what can I say, I have been working since I was 15 years old, I can’t just turn that off. Haha.
Since that time, I have learned to slow down and take time for myself. I have learned that it is not selfish to put my own needs first. Sounds weird to say that but it’s true. And I am happier for it, it just took me a little longer to get there. What can I say, I am still a work in progress.
7. Set an Outrageous Goal
Arguably, I started my journey at one of the worst times in US history. I don’t think anyone would have blamed me for giving up. But none of that reality kept me from making an outrageous goal of reaching $1 MIL net worth.
I set that goal and reminded myself every day. And every day I would do one thing that would bring me one step closer. It didn’t always feel that way but eventually when opportunity presented itself, I was indeed ready.
The one constant in life is change. For that reason, there is always opportunity. You just have to put yourself in a position to seize it.
8. How many income streams is too much?
Think about this, 68% of those with a net worth of > $30 MIL are self-made according to Wealth-X. Fidelity also did a study and found that 88% of all millionaires are self-made, meaning no inheritance. How did they do it?
Turns out the average millionaire has an average of seven income streams. Seven. According to the IRS, the most popular ones are 1. paycheck (earned income), 2. stock dividends, 3. real estate, 4. royalty income, 5. interest from savings, 6. bonds, and even 7. profits from a business.
Building these income streams can take years, and that is where the slow and steady approach comes in. Have fun with it. How many income streams do you have?
9. Always Take the Free Money
This may seem obvious; I mean who doesn’t want free money? Truth is a lot of free money is left on the table.
According to a CNBC article, 2023 marked an 11.5% increase in 401(k) millionaires, calling them the “poster child for staying the course”.
10. It’s never too late to start.
I started my FI journey at 40 years young with $257,000 of debt, unemployment, two kids to raise, no family support and little cash in the bank. Ten years later, through real estate and other investments, I reached my FI number. And if you are thinking I “got lucky” then here is a short list of examples of other late starters:
- Martha Stewart published her first book at 41 and launched Martha Stewart Living seven years later.
- Ray Kroc was 50 before he started his first McDonald’s restaurant.
- Kathryn Joosten got her big acting break at the age of 60 starring on the West Wing.
- Colonel Harland Sanders opened his first KFC at the age of 62.
- Julia Child made her first TV debut on The French Chef at 51.
- Stan Lee started his climb to fame and fortune in comics with The Fantastic Four in his 40s.
And so many other examples… today more than ever there are literally hundreds of ways to make income streams, but it requires grit, commitment and hard work. Start where you are.
11. There is always another opportunity around the corner.
I am sure we all have opportunities we passed on or money mistakes we regret, but there is always another opportunity around the corner.
I made plenty of financial mistakes, but I learned from them, let go of the past and focused on here and now. The only constant is change. It’s a matter of paying attention and seizing the opportunity.
12. Always do your homework.
I learned the hard way to not rely on anyone one person.
I do a lot of my own research and ask a lot of questions from several people I trust. I take my time before making any decisions. None of us has a crystal ball all we can do is make the best decision in that moment and have a plan for each risk.
13. The Curse of “One More Year”
In ten years, I went from $257,000 of debt to a net worth of $1MIL. In three years, I built a real estate portfolio, purchasing five SFH’s. It was whirlwind.
I reached my goal, so, why did I not quit? I could give all kinds of reasons, but it boils down to, I wasn’t ready. It’s a slippery slope to stay too long and put your dreams on hold. It’s easy to succumb to fear.
For me, four years went by, just like that. But, in that time, I 1) paid off my primary home (emotional decision – not a financial one), 2) refinanced my rental property consolidated loan and learned that the values had gone up so much three homes were now owned free and clear, leaving my consolidated loan to cover two home and at a 15/7 4% fixed rate and 3) I increased the HELOC loan amount. I also padded my HYS account to last just a little bit longer.
All these decisions only put me in a stronger position.
You know its funny, when I tell people that I am retired, the response is that I am “lucky”. But as Oprah once said, “Luck is preparation meeting opportunity.” When I think about it like that, maybe I am lucky because it was a lot of preparation that met great opportunities.
Yes, I did a lot of preparation, and it was a lot of hard work but none of it would have gotten any traction if it wasn’t for my local branch manager convincing the bank to take a chance on me to buy that first rental property. Without that, none of this could have been possible, at least not in the way it unfolded. Over the years, we lost touch, and I have no idea if he knows the impact he had on my life.
Today I fill my time with my kids, friends, hiking, hosting dinner parties, traveling, volunteering, and coaching people on how they can grab their own slice of financial independence. I appreciate the freedom I have built and hope that I am teaching my own kids, through example, the kind of life I would want for them. Never stop learning, it’s a big world out there.
Sonya says
You have an amazing story. It is very inspirational.
Monica says
Thank you!
Nick says
I can see why so many people encouraged you to write a book. Your story is inspiring but it is also relatable and achievable. Of course, your timing in the housing market was great. In hindsight. During the thick of it there was no guarantee that things would work out.
A clear vision, persistence and hard work – these are tools that are available to all but not easy to wield consistently for years. Congratulations!
I know people in CA and FL who are immigrants or the children of immigrants. They started with little or nothing and have created sound financial lives for themselves and their families. Much of their success is based on hard work, seizing opportunities and a long time horizon. They made their own luck. Just like you.
Monica says
Thank you for your kind words! I absolutely agree. The vision of my future life was clear and got me through the toughest years. Without it, I would have given up.
MI_263 says
Congratulations! I loved hearing the story about your son. I watched my own parents build their way from nothing to financial independence, and it instilled in me the drive I have today. Your example is an incredible gift to him.
Monica says
Thank you!
Chris says
What a great success story. Thank you for sharing and taking the time to write a book too.
Monica says
Thank you. Writing gave me a whole new perspective and appreciation of how hard it is to publish a book
May says
Congrats Monica! From one previous single mom to another. I read your book and you are so inspiring!
Monica says
Thank you my friend!
M150 says
I really loved your comment that financial independence “requires grit, commitment and hard work.” People seem to think money is just easily obtained, lottery or inherited, but it is a lifetime commitment. The long game. That commitment could be paying your way through college, and then going up the corporate ladder. It could be the “luck” of timing the real estate market, but opportunity is only for those who have a plan, dedication and hard work to make sure the plan succeeds. I’m sure there were many one step forward, and two steps back, but with each obstacle, you learned from them. Congratulations on your hard work and dedication.
Monica Scudieri says
Thank you for the kind words. Yes I have had many people comment how “lucky” I am on the real estate… and how money just comes to me… but it took a lot of hard work, dedication, grit and understanding that with each setback, its just a point in time. It is why I ultimately decided to publish my net worth at the end of each chapter in the book… to demonstrate that there is no lottery win or inheritance… just a lot of hard work and seizing opportunities.
MI221 says
What a heartwarming story! And great of you to encourage others through your book. Wishing you all the best!
BTW started my business at age 41, now 37 years ago. FI at 50 but kept going. Loved the independence!
Monica says
Thanks, and congratulations to you!! Yes, financial independence makes all the difference when starting a business. I love that!!
Financial Fives says
Your resilience and optimism is refreshing! You went though hardship and now have turned things around with a successful life, in all aspects. Good for you for having the bravery to take a risk and acquire those properties so aggressively.
Would you say the downturn in the housing market played a big role in being able to afford those homes and find ones that met the 1% rule? Seems impossible to find those these days.
Monica says
Thank you! It’s true; without the downturn, I would not have been able to purchase five SFHs in three years. It would have definitely taken longer. But I have also missed opportunities that, when I look back on them, I wish I had taken advantage of. One thing is for certain: there is always another opportunity around the corner!
MI-404 says
What an inspirational story! I’m going to send this to my kids who are currently in the rough years of building careers, raising kids, and dealing with the high cost of … everything.
You are an inspiration, and I love the fact that you took the time to sit down and write a book so you could help people you’ve never met.
Monica says
Thank you for your kind words and support!! As for writing the book, I had a lot of encouragement and support from friends. I don’t know if it would have seen the light of day without that. Since the book came out, I have been humbled by the response. I hope you kids get value out of my story!!
FinanceLady says
I appreciate the fact that we are reading about more and more about the financial journeys of more single women (and single parents) now. As a woman who is divorced for a long time, I want to read more of these types of stories. These are rare and I appreciate those.
Congrats Monica! I enjoyed reading your story.